Sandra Owens Page 4
He begged an introduction, and forgot about meeting his friends. Although he had thought he would not marry for years, he’d known he had just met his future wife. Beginning that night, he set about the serious business of courting Lady Diana Cavanaugh, the daughter of the Marquess of Rotharton.
Michael slipped a hand inside his coat and pressed a finger against the letter. He had planned to give it to her to read, but now decided to wait until they reached Wyburne. He had her agreement to come with him and was hesitant to do anything that would cause further reluctance on her part.
The subject of his musings entered the cottage and he couldn’t help comparing his memories of her to the woman standing in the middle of the room looking lost. Her hair was still the same rich honey color, but now pulled back in a tight knot low on her neck. Her rich brown eyes no longer sparkled, and her once rose-tinged cheeks were devoid of color.
Her taller than average height hadn’t changed, of course, but her body had. She was stick thin and he would guess she gave most of her food to James. For that, he didn’t blame her—he would have done the same in her circumstances. He couldn’t undo the past, but he could bloody damn well improve her life. He owed her that much, and more.
He walked to her and gently touched her arm. She flinched and Leo’s voice laughed in his ear. She can no longer bear the touch of a man.
“My carriage is just down the road. While I go and collect it, gather what you need, and then we are leaving this poor excuse of a house.”
Michael strode out of the cottage. He had instructed his coachman to park out of sight so that if she saw it before he found her, she wouldn’t try to run. He walked with long furious strides down the lane, his blood boiling with rage. Damn Leo to hell and pray he burns there for all eternity.
****
Diana hugged the corner inside the carriage, putting as much distance between her and Daventry as possible. He hadn’t touched her since that last time in the cottage and she was thankful for it. If Jamie hadn’t been with them, she didn’t think she could have borne being alone with him. He had mostly talked to Jamie, slowly winning her son over. But every so often, he would address a question or comment to her and she would be forced to pay him attention. Like now.
“Are you comfortable, Diana?”
She wished he would ignore her. As for his familiar use of her name, she had given up correcting him hours ago. “Yes.” He smiled and she wanted him to stop doing that, too.
“We will stop tonight at an inn. Although we are only a few hours from Wyburne, it is growing dark and I think a decent dinner and a rest is in order.”
“How many pennies will that cost?” Jamie asked. “Mama only has a few left.”
“Jamie!” Lord, had he just told Daventry how desperate they were?
Pink stained his cheeks, and tears filled his eyes. “I’m sorry, Mama. I didn’t mean to do wrong.”
She glanced at Daventry. He rested his head back against the seat watching them from under hooded eyes, his body seemingly in a relaxed state. One would think he wasn’t paying attention, but she knew differently. He didn’t miss a thing. How would he react to Jamie’s misspeak?
She bit down on her bottom lip to keep from assuring Jamie he had done nothing wrong. She needed to know how the earl would deal with her son. How was a child to know one didn’t discuss personal finances?
Daventry lazily unfolded his crossed legs, pushed up in his seat, and smiled. “Did you know, Jamie—may I have the honor of addressing you as Jamie?”
Jamie nodded. “Yes, sir.”
Diana wondered at the warmth in Daventry’s eyes when he looked at Jamie. There was something there, something she didn’t understand. At Jamie’s nod, a grin lit up the man’s face. Interested in spite of herself, she waited for what Daventry would say next.
He reached across and tapped Jamie on his knee. “Thank you. You would not give me leave to have the use of a favored name if you did not consider me a friend. I am honored. As I was saying, did you know there was once a man who was very lonely?”
Jamie shook his head. “What did he do?”
“Well, he woke up one morning and found his house gone, also his horse and furniture, everything just disappeared. The only thing left was the bed he slept in and three pennies. What do you thing he did next?”
“I don’t know. What?” Jamie moved to the edge of his seat.
“Why, the only thing he could. It was a lovely bed, a soft one and because of all the covers, a very warm one. He took his soft, warm bed along with his three pennies and went to see a witch.”
“A witch?” Jamie breathed. “Was he afraid?”
Daventry’s voice lowered, drawing her in. “Oh, yes, very much so. But he called on all his courage because there was one thing he wanted more than any other.”
“What did he want?” Diana asked, startling herself. She pushed back into her corner and clamped her lips together. What was wrong with her? She turned and looked out the window, but couldn’t stop listening.
“He wanted a dog.”
A dog? She had fallen into his spell only to hear that?
“Why?” Jamie asked.
Yes, why? That was a stupid thing to want. She would ask for food and plenty of money to care for Jamie. She would ask that the ten years she had spent under Leo’s cruel hands disappear from her memory. There were a thousand things she would ask for over a dog. She waited for the answer. Silence. Against her will, she turned back to Daventry to find him looking at her. It seemed he only awaited her attention to continue.
“Because he was lonely and remembered that, as a boy, he had a dog that barked with joy whenever he came near. Whether he was happy or sad that dog was always his friend, always there for him.” His gaze bored into hers. “Because, all the soft beds and pennies in the world don’t mean anything if you don’t have a true friend.”
Diana tore her eyes away. Was he offering friendship? There had been a time when he was her dearest friend, one she believed would stand by her no matter what. Such a naïve fool she had been. He had proven he could not be counted on. He had not always been there for her.
“I don’t have a friend,” Jamie said.
Her heart cried to hear the longing in Jamie’s voice. It also hurt her feelings.
“Now, there is where you are wrong young man. First of all, there is no one dearer to you than your mother. Then, you have me.”
She turned away again, refusing to listen to the conversation between the man and boy. She wanted to put a stop to it before he broke Jamie’s heart, too. She thought of running. If not for Jamie, she would slip out tonight after everyone was asleep, but she could not take him into an uncertain future. There was no consideration of leaving him behind. So, here she was with a man she no longer knew, and no matter his words, he was not her friend.
Jamie laughed at something Daventry said. Leo had repeatedly ranted over all the ways and reasons that Lord Daventry was a villain. Had Jamie already forgotten?
****
Michael glanced at Diana. She sat across from him, squeezed into the corner and pretended to ignore them, but tension pulsated from her. He continued to try and draw her into conversation, but with the exception of her interest in his inane story, she offered no more than one word answers to his questions. Although why he was trying so hard, he didn’t understand.
He turned his attention back to the boy. Jamie’s suspicion seemed to be lessening. The knife lay on the seat next to him, forgotten. Michael didn’t doubt, however, that if he made a threatening move toward Diana that Jamie would do his best to protect her. He respected the boy for that. If this lad was truly his son, then as a father, he couldn’t be prouder. He frowned at the rags Jamie wore. A good father would see that his child was clothed properly.
“As we are stopping early today, I think we should do some shopping.”
“Shopping for what, sir?”
He was going to have to think of something Jamie could call him besides sir.
It was probably too soon for Papa, he thought with some amusement. “I think we should purchase new clothes for you and your mother.”
Michael looked at Diana and raised a brow, fully expecting her to refuse his offer. She kept her face turned away, remaining silent. He studied her profile. Would her eyes ever sparkle again? Could he bring laughter back into her life? No, that was no longer his responsibility. His task now consisted of no more than to see her housed, fed and clothed properly.
Lost in his thoughts, he half listened to Jamie’s chatter. When they stopped, he offered a helping hand to assist Diana out of the carriage, but she held onto the door and stepped past him. The two of them looked like beggars he had picked up on the side of the road, and that was one thing he could correct immediately.
By the time they finished shopping, they had spent three hours in various shops and his little family could now look presentable. But he was disturbed by how biddable Diana had been, standing listlessly by while he chose several day dresses for her. When he asked her what colors she preferred, she shrugged.
“Whatever you think best, my lord,” she said.
She only showed interest when they selected clothing for Jamie. He hadn’t been shy in showing his excitement in having new clothes, and when Michael had added a ball and cloth bag of marbles to the pile on the counter, the boy looked up at him with bright, wide eyes.
“Oh, thank you sir,” he exclaimed.
Michael’s heart took a funny little tumble at the look of joy on his possible son’s face. He wished he knew for sure. Even if Jamie was his cousin, he would care for the lad, but a son? He wasn’t sure how he felt about it. It would assuredly cause some complications if it turned out to be true.
Diana picked up the ball from the counter and handed it to Jamie. “Take your ball and wait for us outside. Don’t wander off, mind you.”
She watched Jamie leave and then turned to him. “You will spoil him, my lord.”
He certainly planned to. Michael glanced at the shopkeeper who watched them with open curiosity. When they had entered, he considered creating a story of highwaymen making off with his wife and son’s travel trunks, but that still wouldn’t account for the state of their dress.
He had chosen not to try to explain to the man something that wasn’t any of his concern. Instead, he gave orders to the shopkeeper as if nothing was amiss. When the man realized the amount of coin he would be putting in his pockets, Diana and Jamie could have been nanny goats for all he cared.
Placing his hand on her elbow, Michael steered her to a private corner. She tensed at his touch and tried to pull away, but he gently pressed his fingers into her arm.
At the back of the shop, he released her and moved to face her. “I fail to see how a simple ball and bag of marbles will spoil him. He is a young boy and needs a few toys to play with.”
Was it the toys that bothered her or that they were gifts from him?
****
Irritation flashed in his eyes and Diana wished she had kept quiet. She no longer knew him. He seemed kind, but it could be all show.
“Do you want me to take them back?” he asked.
Jamie would be crushed. He had never owned a toy in his life. Leo hadn’t allowed it. Secretly, she was thrilled he now had a few things to play with. But a rage had been slowly building at how easily his lordship had won Jamie over. He was her son, and now that Leo was gone, she didn’t want to share him with another man, especially this one.
It wasn’t the toys that bothered her. His lordship had dropped out of the sky and, without a by-your-leave, taken control of their lives. She didn’t know why or what he wanted from her, but once again, she found herself at the mercy of a man. Was this to be her life?
“Diana, look at me.”
Used to obeying Leo’s demands, she looked up and sucked in a breath. She had forgotten how soft a man’s eyes could appear when filled with compassion. He lightly touched her arm with his fingers, but still, she winced. Words she had never before heard in polite company crossed his lips.
“Bloody hell, what did my cousin do to you?”
Did he have eleven years to hear it all? Because that was her answer, eleven years of living the unimaginable. The pity in his eyes was her undoing. She turned and ran out of the shop.
Across the street was a small park and she headed straight for it. She came to a bench, fell down onto it, and buried her face in her hands. Through great effort, she did not cry. She hadn’t cried since the first time Leo had beat her, refusing to give him the satisfaction. Leo had turned her into something less than human, but she had held onto a sliver of pride that kept her from showing him her tears.
“Mama?”
She pulled Jamie to her and hugged him tight.
“Mama, did he hurt you?”
She looked at her son in confusion. “Who?”
“Lord Daventry. Father said he wasn’t to be trusted and I forgot, but I won’t again.”
Standing behind James, Daventry watched as if awaiting her answer. What did he want from her? She forced her gaze back to Jamie’s.
“No, love, no one has hurt me. It was only seeing you so happy with your new ball and marbles that made me want to cry.”
Jamie looked relieved, apparently not wanting to lose his new friend, but would have for her. Never, not even after the interminable years with Leo had she felt so lost. When it had been only her and Jamie this past year, she had a purpose. Grow potatoes, find a way to purchase chickens so they would have eggs, keep Jamie alive even at the expense of her own health. What was she to do with herself now?
She forced a smile. “Do you know any marble games, Jamie, or would you like Lord Daventry to teach you some?” She knew the answer. Jamie had never owned, nor played a game of marbles in his life.
“Oh, sir, would you?”
Daventry squatted on his haunches and put his hand on Jamie’s shoulder. “When we reach Wyburne, I will teach you all the games I know. I daresay, it won’t take long before you are the best marble player ever.”
The proud grin on Jamie’s face was something new, something she never thought to see. How in merciful heavens did Daventry do it? Was it possible he was different from Leo?
“My lady,” he said and held out his arm. “May I escort you to the inn? You have time to rest and prepare for dinner.”
Prepare for dinner? She wanted to have a tray sent to her room, away from him. Everything about him overwhelmed her. His expensive clothing, his powerful body, even his scent was more than she was ready for, more than she knew what to do with. There had been a time when she stood next to him in her fashionable gowns and artfully styled hair and felt like she belonged. Now, she wore rags, her hair was a tangled knot and she feared she might be giving off an unpleasant odor. She no longer knew who she was.
He must have seen her panic because he looked at Jamie. “I wish to invite you and your mother to dine with me tonight, Jamie. You can dress in some of your new finery. After our dinner perhaps you would like to take an evening stroll?”
The man was too clever by putting the question to Jamie. If she said no, then it would appear as if she were being churlish.
“Oh, yes sir, I would like that.”
“My lady? Will you join Lord James and me for dinner?”
Identical ink-blue eyes looked back at her. Something unwelcome slithered up her spine, but she dismissed the similarities. Leo was Daventry’s cousin and they bore an obvious likeness even though Leo’s eyes were a pale blue. So, Jamie’s were deep blue. It didn’t mean anything.
“Please, say yes, Mama.”
She could not bring herself to deny her son.
****
Diana washed herself and Jamie as best she could, frowning at the brownish tint the water in the bowl turned as she dipped the cloth into it. When had she stopped caring about being clean? After finishing with Jamie, she stood behind the screen and scrubbed under her arms, under her breasts, and between her legs so hard her irritated skin
turned pink. She lifted an arm and sniffed. The pleasure of the fresh scent of soap was so great it almost brought her to her knees.
She wore the first dress she unwrapped. In the other packages she found a pair of half boots, two chemises, stockings, and a comb. He must have added those after she ran out of the shop. He had no right buying her such personal items, even if she desperately needed them.
Once she had Jamie dressed in his new clothes, she spent another thirty minutes getting the tangles out of her hair before twisting it back into a knot low on her neck. She wished she had been able to wash it, but it would have been impossible to do in the small bowl of water.
A knock sounded and she took a deep breath seeking to calm her nerves. Jamie bounded to the door and opened it, a wide smile of greeting for the man standing in the hall.
“Well, Jamie, don’t you look a capital fellow tonight?”
Her son stood taller at this compliment, his little chest puffing out in pleasure. “Thank you, sir.”
Lifting his gaze to hers, Daventry smiled. She didn’t return it and prayed he would not comment on her appearance.
His eyes studied her as if reading her deepest thoughts. She held still under his scrutiny, something she had learned to do the hard way.
“My lady, shall we go down to dinner?”
Would he beat her if she said no?
Chapter Four
Michael held out his arm and waited. And waited. He wanted to compliment her appearance, almost had, but something in her eyes stopped him. The muslin day dress was a considerable improvement over her pitiful black gown. The blue was a pleasing contrast to her honey-colored hair. He would liked to have seen something other than the tight twist low on her neck. And why was he thinking of her hair?
Jamie walked out, stopping next to him. Michael continued to hold out his arm. He hoped she didn’t think she could outlast him. She looked at his arm as if it might bite her. Perhaps this was something he could do for her. If he could help her learn to accept the touch of a man again it would help ease her way back to the life she deserved. How was she to dance at a ball if she couldn’t bear to have a man touch her? How was she to stroll in the park with a beau? She was young and should marry again, but how could she until she got over her fears? Something twisted in his heart at these thoughts, but he ignored it.